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Welcome, ta Freddy Fazbearss Pizzaria! A magical place fo' lil playas n' grown-ups alike, where magic n' fantasy come ta game biaaatch! If we catch yo' ass fuckin' up some shit, we be like, "Eyy, our phat asses didn't do dis shiznit man."
Thatz what tha fuck tha fuck they holla'd anyway...
This all started on tha 69th October, 1969. I needed a lil' bit of chedda, jist ta pay off mah meth-bill ta tha pimp daddy. I saw some advertisement wit some creepy fucker as tha photo, sayin dat I had ta peep dat shitarse or something. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Seemed easy as fuck as fuck enough.
I took up tha thang, went tha fuck tha fuck into mah Office, n' gots locked n loaded ta start mah first night on watchin dis muthafuckas ass.
Some nizzle came along n' holla'd dat I had ta be careful or something.
K.
I was chillin there fo' 38.43 minutes n' gots bugged up as fuck. I whipped up mah MP3 n' played mah phat playa Lil' Weezy. Da jam was so intens dat I just had ta start tokin some weed. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! I looked all up in tha cameras a one of tha sneaky fuckers was gone. I laughed, n' went up tha door of mah crib.
Dat shiznit was so fuckin dark I had ta take LSD, just ta kick thangs off. I vomited over some lil kidz picture of his thugged-out ass n' a gangbangin' funky-ass bear cookin meth.
Shiznit, tha LSD was so phat I was seein bunniea tryin ta shove a cold-ass lil cold-ass lil costume up in mah dirty ass. I was just like, "Woah, fucknut. Calm tha shiznit man. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. I aint talkin' bout chicken n' gravy biatch. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Right back up in yo muthafuckin ass. Sit down n' let's... like... smoke n' stuff."
Some time later.
"Holy dope baby Poseiden I be baked off mah tits." Da bunny holla'd.
"I know... wait... did you say... unicorn, cuz onez right behind yo thugged-out ass."
"Oooh, Chica girrrl come smoke shiiiit..."
"I be shartin up fuckin sprinklez man..." I complained. Y'all KNOW dat shit, muthafucka! "I need ta bounce tha fuck out... bake vomit or something."
I stumbled over ta tha toilets n' vomited over tha floor.
"Shiznit, one of mah thugs clean up dis peanut crap."
A costum rocked up.
Oh... is you tha sticky-icky-ickylord?"
It just laid there... motionless.
"Come here."
I jumped tha fuck tha fuck into tha suit n' strutted back ta tha westside hall.
"Hey... muthafuckas... I be tha sticky-icky-ickylord n' shit..."
They all laughed they baked asses off.
We all sharted sprinklez n' fucked off ta Dopeville.
Da end.